Pre-Race Contemplation

10 days until Sageburner and I'm really starting to itch. I know that this happens every time I race, but still I thought I'd be better prepared this time. I get anxious. Not nervous. Not scared. Anxious. It's annoying because I can't control it, and I truly think that all things in life should be savoured, sort of like that first cup of coffee in the morning. Smooth. However, with 10 days to go, I find myself wishing it were here already so I can run it and get it over with. I really don't want to think this way, and I certainly am not trying to run these races to put a notch in my belt (it would look like a scratch really anyways). I want to take in the whole experience, the race, the post-race, mingling, the mountains. I still think that it will happen, and I'm gonna be up in Gunnison for the rest of the weekend with 2 friends. I haven't been out with the guys in over 2 years. It will bring back some freshness that I feel I've been lacking, and I fear sometimes I may take that out on others, my family in particular. In any case, there are a few things that make me think that this anxiety may go away. Most importantly, my son turns 1 this Sunday and we've got family coming into town that I haven't seen in quite a while and for that I'm grateful. I still can't believe that I've been a father for a year and I'm not 25 yet. Also, my wife, father-in-law, and myself will be running a small 5K the morning of the party and it will be really fun. I've been really happy to see my wife start to really enjoy running, she's so damn cute when she hops out the door. She'll be heading for a PR hopefully, and certainly I will be as well. I haven't run a 5K race since I first started running for fun 2 1/2 years ago and I think my PR was (and I guess is) 23:22. Now I can run a 21:00 without sweating and I'll probably shoot for 19:59 just because, though I'll back off if I don't feel well. No reason to get hurt in a 5K. In any case, I'm glad to be running, I'm glad it's warming up, and I'm really glad to be alive and well.